Fundraisers of the World: Please take note...

It started out reasonably enough...

Occasionally, we received a nice package of address labels, usually with a patriotic theme, from an organization whose goals we appreciated. Occasionally, we responded with some funds for their activities.

Apparently, that was a mistake...

Soon, we were receiving not just labels, but greeting cards and notepads and pens...Patriotic designs gave way to more variety, including flowery stationery that said "Mr. Randy Honcoop" on the top line -- not exactly his style.

They must have known that we now possessed labels by the thousands, and cards by the hundreds, so they began to send us other, larger more valuable items, though a fleece throw you can send in an envelope I would consider of dubious value. But then there were the shirts, the hats, the tote bags...

But last week came the WORST item of them all: a single sock.

I was so unhappy to find a fat envelope in my mail that I didn't even read the explanation of their gimmick...I stared disbelieving at the single, perfectly whole and white sock.

They just have no idea how problematic a single sock is to a Dutch girl...

In a fit of pique, I threw it to the floor for the dogs to play with, hoping that they would soon tear large holes in it, making it plausible for me to throw it away. They weren't interested.

I ignored the sock and left it on the floor, only to find later that Randy had carefully put it in the laundry...I gave it back to the dogs...He later returned it to the laundry room, hanging it over my chair so I would see his charitable action with my irresponsibility, goodness -- leaving a perfectly good sock lying around!

Apparently, Dutch boys have the same trouble...

What to do with a perfectly good item? Throwing it away is so wasteful...Keeping it around is so troublesome...Sometimes you do need a single sock, but where shall I keep this one so I can find it then? Can I bring it to the Thrift Store? Would someone buy a single sock? It's perfectly good...Maybe I should ask the kids if any of them are short of a sock...It's in mint condition...Somebody take the {mumble, mumble} sock!!

Fundraisers of the world: Please consider the possible torture that may ensue when you send us stuff ...Oh, the burden of perfectly good but useless items!! Nobody wants them, but nobody will throw them away, so they go from pillar to post, thrift store to thrift store, and eventually end up in some hoarder's...uh, hoard...cluttering up the already cluttered earth.

I would like to say right now "DON'T SEND ME ANY MORE STUFF!!!"

But I can't do that until you send me the other sock and put me out of my misery.